Our Community Values — Our Commitment

The Essex Center is a learning community. 

The following policies make this learning community what it is, experientially, for all participants. Therefore, acceptance of, and working toward, understanding and fullfilling these policies is mandatory for participation at the Essex Center, whether an individual is a visitor, guest, program participant, member, staff, advisor, or leader. 

This is what makes the Essex Center a unique, safe, and effective learning environment for every single person here. 

Every participant takes responsibility for their own education.

Every participant takes responsibility to help others in their education.

Every participant takes responsibility, whether in large or small ways, to build and care for the learning environment, which in the future will include the relationships among people here, the programs and services, the building, and the grounds.

For those, due to their talents, needs, and development, who cannot be expected to achieve every participation requirement, we work to make the needed accomodations. We welcome individual differences as a wonderful gift.

For those who are actively or intentionally disruptive to our policies, we will attempt a respectful but assertive feedback, educational, and re-directive process. If that does not succeed, or sufficiently succeed, such persons will no longer be able to participate at this private agency because this is a place for people who are striving to achieve our ideals, a welcoming, safe place for people who wish to experience our ideals.

Every participant's observable behavior — words, body language, and expression — shows respect to others. 

It is not possible for most people to actually respect all other people and their behaviors. It is possible to treat people respectfully, "to show respect" despite disagreements or even strong opposition to their policies and actions.

We place a priority on being aware of the experience of others at our center, in person or online currently. Their experience is our priority, because our participants create and sustain the learning community. 

We ask such questions as: did anyone reach out to welcome you and assure that you were guided properly to the program attended? Were you treated with respect at this meeting and did you have a chance to make your views heard?

All participants learn step-by-step — with our supportive guidance and formal mentoring — to receive feedback from, and give feedback to, others in a respectful, considered, and assertive manner. 

Appropriate feedback addresses the behavior of another person, not their character, status, or worth. We describe behaviors not traits. We do not label or name-call people, because to label people is to attack or judge them. We cannot know what a person is truly like from our vantage point on their outside, but we can be perceptive about their observable behavior and comment on that. 

Assertion is welcome; aggression is not welcome. Attacking people rather than their ideas is not allowed. Zero-sum (I win, you lose), unnecessarily harsh, and destructive communication may be acceptable elsewhere, but not here. Questions to presenters, responses by presenters, staff internal communication, blogs, letters to editors of publication: all must meet the standard of fairness, assertiveness, and showing respect.

As a private agency, we can and do regulate the quality of feedback given and received among staff, in writings, and between participants. This is because there is much misunderstanding and misuse of freedom in such communications. We have specially dedicated this agency to address this problem and its solution.

The Essex Center is a program of the Divine Providence Abbey Community, but it is a secular, non-religious, non-spiritual life education service to the community at large. 

As such, it follows the policies and practices described on this website and relevant publications. This includes the steps for growth of spirit (attitude or philosophy, NOT spirituality or religion), values, study, service, and vision.

Discussing various religious and spiritual beliefs and practices is a natural part of life education. 

Arguing or pushing for adopting of the beliefs of any particular religion or spirituality is strictly prohibited at the Essex Center for Life Education. People may maintain their participation in other, outside spiritual or religious centers for meeting such needs.